Kids--they seem to rule my world these days. They HAVE ruled my world--ever since my first nephew was born almost 10 years ago--I have preferred to spend time with them rather than dawdle at the dining room. I keep them company while the rest of the adult world are doing adult stuff. I entertained them with their cars--creating cliffs and ravines with the pillows for the cars to run down and turn turtle. They learned that word from me.
Why now though, now that it's my son's turn to get that fun piece of me, do I find myself turning into the adult I have dreaded? Where is that fun woman who got into the world of the other children? Although I can still crawl under the table with him, I find myself running out of things to do with him. I am determined to find her--and show Javo that person. I need to look for activities to do with him. What is a sedentary, usually couch-potato person, going to play with an active, ready-to-explore the world toddler?
I am hiding behind this post to get my energy and interact with Javo the way I know I can. I should stop hiding, go out and play.
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I so get that world, Silvermother. So many times I find myself rewinding scenes where I can see Diego so immersed in his world of play and so eager to draw me in yet, at that moment, I am blind to the fun of it and can only dwell on the mess it is. It's that dark colored glasses called responsibility that gets in the way of my seeing the joy that he so generously offers me.
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